For years I have been a rather avid gardener. Between clippings from various plants and the leaves from 11 live oaks, I create an abundance of debris. I generally try to compost these materials, as the compost is very beneficial for my beds and lawn. I have seen significant improvements where I use the compost.
Just to be clear, I don't compost in order to save the planet. I compost in order to save my yard. Or more specifically, in order to produce healthy plants so that I can enjoy pretty flowers, a lush lawn, and tasty vegetables.
Last winter's freeze took a real toll on my landscaping. My tropicals died back to the ground, and many just plain died. I lost several hibiscus, and those that survived have not bloomed all year. My rubber tree--which once stood about 30 foot tall--not comes in at a paltry 3 feet. But the vines, such as Rangoon Creeper and Star Jasmine--have come storming back with a vengeance.
We had our best tomato and cucumber crops ever, which I attribute to the compost I added to the garden in the spring. And our antique roses produced more flowers than in the past. To some extent, these successes help make up for the lack of hibiscus, which bloom almost year round.
Gardening can be a time consuming hobby. Pruning, fertilizing, planting, watering, and other tasks must be performed regularly. But it is also rewarding. We almost always have multiple plants in bloom, including azaleas, sages, jasmine, roses, hibiscus, and more. These plants attract butterflies, which flitter around the yard most of the year, as well as hummingbirds, cardinals, blue jays, and on several occasions, wild parakeets.
Our pond is also a source of ongoing effort and pleasure. Home to a number of koi and goldfish, it regularly attracts toads who enjoy mating on its fringes. I could live with the toads, given the fact that they eat mosquitoes and other nasty insects, but their nocturnal mating ritual involves an ear piercing noise that makes it almost impossible to sleep. I have on many occasions been forced to disrupt their mating in order to sleep. (That alone makes for an interesting story.)
I am sometimes amazed at what we have created in our back yard. It is a miniature wildlife sanctuary. But its purpose is to provide pleasure to human life.
Showing posts with label personal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personal. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Rush and Rand
Like many, I was introduced to the work of Ayn Rand by the Canadian rock band Rush. An early album was dedicated to "the genius of Ayn Rand." While I was a Rush fan in high school, it was several years before I read anything by Rand. Even then, while I found her work compelling, neither Anthem nor The Fountainhead motivated me to read further. That motivation came when I was about 23 and served on a jury for an attempted murder trial.
The defendant in the case pleaded guilty by reason of insanity (or whatever the plea is). He definitely seemed to have mental problems, but we convicted him in about an hour. That part of the trial was easy. The sentencing phase was much more difficult.
We were presented with a range of options, from probation to 20 years. We finally settled on 7 years, a decision which I remain comfortable with given the context of my knowledge at the time. But after the trial I was bothered by the difficulty of the decision. I began to wonder how we are to make decisions regarding moral issues.
To solve my dilemma I decided to study religion, since religion was the only source of morality known to me at the time. I went to the book store to stock up on writings on the great religions. Fortunately, the philosophy section was next to the religion section. Spotting several of Rand's works, I thought that she was likely to have better answers than religion. (I considered myself an agnostic at the time.)
I tried to read The Virtue of Selfishness, but was overwhelmed within a few pages. She addressed issues and ideas that were completely foreign to me. But I persevered, and with a dictionary as a constant companion, I dove into "The Objectivist Ethics." Before I was finished I concluded that I had found the source for the answers I was seeking. I then began to devour everything I could find that Ayn Rand had written, and the rest, as they say, is history.
I tell this story because Rush is playing in Houston this weekend. I will miss their concert because I am presenting a paper to the Houston Objectivism Society, but I will be there in spirit. While they are playing songs that have moved and inspired me for years, I will be talking about the ideas that have changed my life. I will have fun, even if I can't play the air guitar.
The defendant in the case pleaded guilty by reason of insanity (or whatever the plea is). He definitely seemed to have mental problems, but we convicted him in about an hour. That part of the trial was easy. The sentencing phase was much more difficult.
We were presented with a range of options, from probation to 20 years. We finally settled on 7 years, a decision which I remain comfortable with given the context of my knowledge at the time. But after the trial I was bothered by the difficulty of the decision. I began to wonder how we are to make decisions regarding moral issues.
To solve my dilemma I decided to study religion, since religion was the only source of morality known to me at the time. I went to the book store to stock up on writings on the great religions. Fortunately, the philosophy section was next to the religion section. Spotting several of Rand's works, I thought that she was likely to have better answers than religion. (I considered myself an agnostic at the time.)
I tried to read The Virtue of Selfishness, but was overwhelmed within a few pages. She addressed issues and ideas that were completely foreign to me. But I persevered, and with a dictionary as a constant companion, I dove into "The Objectivist Ethics." Before I was finished I concluded that I had found the source for the answers I was seeking. I then began to devour everything I could find that Ayn Rand had written, and the rest, as they say, is history.
I tell this story because Rush is playing in Houston this weekend. I will miss their concert because I am presenting a paper to the Houston Objectivism Society, but I will be there in spirit. While they are playing songs that have moved and inspired me for years, I will be talking about the ideas that have changed my life. I will have fun, even if I can't play the air guitar.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Unexpected Absence
Last Tuesday I was struck by sudden and severe back pain that persisted through the weekend. It was unbearable to sit at my computer for more than a few minutes at a time. Fortunately, I am much better today but it may be a few days before I resume regular posts.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Lemonade and Berries
This past Sunday was Lemonade Day--a day when an estimated 50,000 of Houston's youth set up lemonade stands across the city. The idea started 5 years ago when the daughter of a Houston businessman asked for money to buy a pet turtle. Her father said "No" and she decided to sell lemonade to raise the money. She never bought the turtle, but her efforts were the start of a program to teach children about business.
The story reminds me of my own business experiences as a child. I grew up in a rural environment, and wild blackberries seemed to grow everywhere. During the summer I would pick the berries and peddle them to relatives and neighbors. Not only did I make a little money, but my customers often shared the pies and cobblers they made with the berries.
Because the blackberries didn't ripen until late in the summer, I could engage my entrepreneurial spirit until August. Fortunately, a strawberry farm was located a few miles from my house. When I was in junior high I would ride my bike to the farm early each morning and pick strawberries for 10 cents a quart. Like the little girl who wanted a turtle, I had a particular item that I wanted to purchase with my money--a week at basketball camp.
I suspect that my parents could have afforded to pay for my trip. But had they done so I would have missed out on a very valuable lesson. From an early age my parents taught me that if I wanted something I had to earn it, and they often provided opportunities to earn money. For example, I was sometimes hired to help with their screen printing business, and when I was older I was paid to remove stumps from our land.
I have a lot of pleasant memories from my childhood, but those that involve making money (and spending the money that I earned) are among the most pleasant.
The story reminds me of my own business experiences as a child. I grew up in a rural environment, and wild blackberries seemed to grow everywhere. During the summer I would pick the berries and peddle them to relatives and neighbors. Not only did I make a little money, but my customers often shared the pies and cobblers they made with the berries.
Because the blackberries didn't ripen until late in the summer, I could engage my entrepreneurial spirit until August. Fortunately, a strawberry farm was located a few miles from my house. When I was in junior high I would ride my bike to the farm early each morning and pick strawberries for 10 cents a quart. Like the little girl who wanted a turtle, I had a particular item that I wanted to purchase with my money--a week at basketball camp.
I suspect that my parents could have afforded to pay for my trip. But had they done so I would have missed out on a very valuable lesson. From an early age my parents taught me that if I wanted something I had to earn it, and they often provided opportunities to earn money. For example, I was sometimes hired to help with their screen printing business, and when I was older I was paid to remove stumps from our land.
I have a lot of pleasant memories from my childhood, but those that involve making money (and spending the money that I earned) are among the most pleasant.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
My Photo
A few years ago, as my fiftieth birthday approached, my wife informed me that she had a surprise for me. The week before my birthday she began giving me clues. I could not guess the nature of the surprise, other than the fact that we were going somewhere for my birthday weekend.
We left work early on Friday (my birthday) but until a few hours prior to our departure, I did not know where we were going. Even though our destination was only 5 miles from our home, my wife could not have made a better choice. We went to downtown Houston, the city that I love. We stayed in a boutique hotel in the heart of downtown.
We spent Friday afternoon wandering the tunnel system, which I have written about here and elsewhere. It brought back memories of when I lived downtown and used the tunnels to walk to the library in inclement weather. On Friday night we had a fabulous dinner at Sambuca, and then listened to jazz music on their patio, sipped after dinner drinks, and I enjoyed a cigar. That day alone would have been a spectacular birthday, but there was more.
On Saturday we took a tour of Minute Maid Park, the home of my beloved Astros. We were taken to the press box, the dugout, the bullpen, and other areas of the park that a fan generally does not see. After a nice lunch we visited the Downtown Aquarium, Sam Houston Park, and just wandered around downtown.
As we headed back to the hotel, my wife informed me that we were going to have dinner at Brennan's. I anticipated a meal that would surpass the evening before, and even that expectation was soon surpassed.
As my wife informed the hostess of our reservation, I heard the hostess say something about the "kitchen table". My heart sank a little, thinking that our romantic dinner would take place at a table close to the kitchen and the noise would disrupt our dinner. As we were led through the restaurant, my suspicion grew stronger as we seemed to be heading in the direction of the kitchen.
And then suddenly we were walking into the kitchen. Overwhelmed with perceptions, I thought, "that looks like Dwyane" and turning to my right "that looks like Alice". We were not going to have dinner by the kitchen, we were going to have dinner in the kitchen with 6 of my best friends.
For the next 3 hours we were treated to a 7 course meal prepared by the executive chef. Men were served one dish and women a different dish for each course, so we were able to sample 2 different dishes for each course. In between, the chef visited our table to discuss the dishes, show us various operations of the kitchen, and talk about food.
For dessert we were served every item on their dessert menu. Ignoring any health concerns, we eagerly passed the plates to one another, sampling all of the decadent and delicious food. It was one of the most, if not the most, memorable nights of my life.
The photo I use on this blog was taken that night in the kitchen of Brennan's. It was a very special evening, arranged by a very special woman.
We left work early on Friday (my birthday) but until a few hours prior to our departure, I did not know where we were going. Even though our destination was only 5 miles from our home, my wife could not have made a better choice. We went to downtown Houston, the city that I love. We stayed in a boutique hotel in the heart of downtown.
We spent Friday afternoon wandering the tunnel system, which I have written about here and elsewhere. It brought back memories of when I lived downtown and used the tunnels to walk to the library in inclement weather. On Friday night we had a fabulous dinner at Sambuca, and then listened to jazz music on their patio, sipped after dinner drinks, and I enjoyed a cigar. That day alone would have been a spectacular birthday, but there was more.
On Saturday we took a tour of Minute Maid Park, the home of my beloved Astros. We were taken to the press box, the dugout, the bullpen, and other areas of the park that a fan generally does not see. After a nice lunch we visited the Downtown Aquarium, Sam Houston Park, and just wandered around downtown.
As we headed back to the hotel, my wife informed me that we were going to have dinner at Brennan's. I anticipated a meal that would surpass the evening before, and even that expectation was soon surpassed.
As my wife informed the hostess of our reservation, I heard the hostess say something about the "kitchen table". My heart sank a little, thinking that our romantic dinner would take place at a table close to the kitchen and the noise would disrupt our dinner. As we were led through the restaurant, my suspicion grew stronger as we seemed to be heading in the direction of the kitchen.
And then suddenly we were walking into the kitchen. Overwhelmed with perceptions, I thought, "that looks like Dwyane" and turning to my right "that looks like Alice". We were not going to have dinner by the kitchen, we were going to have dinner in the kitchen with 6 of my best friends.
For the next 3 hours we were treated to a 7 course meal prepared by the executive chef. Men were served one dish and women a different dish for each course, so we were able to sample 2 different dishes for each course. In between, the chef visited our table to discuss the dishes, show us various operations of the kitchen, and talk about food.
For dessert we were served every item on their dessert menu. Ignoring any health concerns, we eagerly passed the plates to one another, sampling all of the decadent and delicious food. It was one of the most, if not the most, memorable nights of my life.
The photo I use on this blog was taken that night in the kitchen of Brennan's. It was a very special evening, arranged by a very special woman.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
My "Green" Initiative
Update 10/20/2009: When this was posted I did not realize that October 15 was "blog action day" and the theme was environmentalism. My choice of topic for this day was purely a coincidence. (HT: Gus Van Horn)
I am generally not one to jump on bandwagons. I usually find them too crowded for my tastes, not to mention the foul odor that seems to emanate from them. But over the summer I decided to hop aboard the "go green" bandwagon.
My green initiative has several aspects. The first, and perhaps most significant, was dumping tons of water on my plants during this summer's drought. I realize that most "go green" initiatives involve conserving water, but as an individualist I will "go green" any damn way I want, thank you very much. The results of this prodigious water use were two-fold. First, my water bill rose significantly. Second, my plants stayed alive, and a few actually thrived. In contrast, my neighbor's yards turned brown, which is not very green in my book.
Another thing I did this summer was get serious about man-made pesticides. In the past I have used pesticides sparingly, primarily because I don't enjoy wandering around my yard spraying toxic chemicals when the temperature is approaching 120 degrees. But I enjoy lace bugs on my azaleas, mealy bug on my hibiscus, and white fly on everything else even less. (Just in case you don't know, lace bugs will turn the leaves of azaleas a putrid gray color, and gray isn't green. Mealy bugs are scaly creatures that suck the life out of plants, and like white fly they are--can you guess--white. White isn't green either.) I realize that true "greenies" don't use man-made pesticides, but as I previously stated, I will "go green" in the manner that I choose.
Another part of my "go green" initiative actually involved something that rabid environmentalists might actually approve. I spent time perfecting my compost piles. You (and my wife) might think it silly to have compost piles in the middle of the nation's fourth largest city. You (and my wife) are wrong.
Compost provides micro-nutrients, microbes, and other yummy stuff to the soil and plants. It makes plants healthy, wealthy, and wise. It breeds earthworms, and earthworms are our friends--they chew up dead organic material and create lots of tiny holes in the ground. And the best part is, worm poop (technically called "castings") is very nutrient rich.
I used to buy dozens of bags of compost each year to spread throughout my yard and gardens. I tended to do this over a few weekends each spring, and it was back breaking work. Now, I can spread a little compost each week, providing my adorable little plants with fresh compost throughout the year. It saves my back and the soil benefits from the steady application of humus. (Humus should not be confused with hummus, which I actually enjoy eating.) And my wife doesn't think that so silly.
An unexpected benefit of my increased interest in compost was the opportunity to commune with nature. There is nothing quite like spending an hour turning a compost pile and letting the earthy smell of rotting vegetable matter waft into your nostrils. You just can't get that experience living in an apartment.
I've also learned many interesting facts about the biology of composting. For example, the ideal compost pile has about 5 parts "brown" to 1 part "green". Now, a rational person might think that "brown" and "green" refer to colors. And that would be wrong. "Brown" refers to carbon rich materials, like dead leaves. "Green" refers to nitrogen rich materials, like fresh grass clippings. So far the brown/ green dichotomy makes sense, but coffee grounds, manure, and urine are "green".
The results of my "go green" initiative have been mixed. This summer's drought undoubtedly stunted the growth of many of my plants. But I am optimistic about the long-term. My adventures with composting are showing signs of greatly benefiting the plants and reducing my watering requirements. My indiscriminate use of pesticides resulted in no mealy bugs or lace bugs this year. My "go green" initiative is not intended to save the planet or anything along those irrational lines. My "go green" initiative is intended for my benefit and my pleasure (and my wife's). And anyone who doesn't like that can kiss my jolly green thumb.
I am generally not one to jump on bandwagons. I usually find them too crowded for my tastes, not to mention the foul odor that seems to emanate from them. But over the summer I decided to hop aboard the "go green" bandwagon.
My green initiative has several aspects. The first, and perhaps most significant, was dumping tons of water on my plants during this summer's drought. I realize that most "go green" initiatives involve conserving water, but as an individualist I will "go green" any damn way I want, thank you very much. The results of this prodigious water use were two-fold. First, my water bill rose significantly. Second, my plants stayed alive, and a few actually thrived. In contrast, my neighbor's yards turned brown, which is not very green in my book.
Another thing I did this summer was get serious about man-made pesticides. In the past I have used pesticides sparingly, primarily because I don't enjoy wandering around my yard spraying toxic chemicals when the temperature is approaching 120 degrees. But I enjoy lace bugs on my azaleas, mealy bug on my hibiscus, and white fly on everything else even less. (Just in case you don't know, lace bugs will turn the leaves of azaleas a putrid gray color, and gray isn't green. Mealy bugs are scaly creatures that suck the life out of plants, and like white fly they are--can you guess--white. White isn't green either.) I realize that true "greenies" don't use man-made pesticides, but as I previously stated, I will "go green" in the manner that I choose.
Another part of my "go green" initiative actually involved something that rabid environmentalists might actually approve. I spent time perfecting my compost piles. You (and my wife) might think it silly to have compost piles in the middle of the nation's fourth largest city. You (and my wife) are wrong.
Compost provides micro-nutrients, microbes, and other yummy stuff to the soil and plants. It makes plants healthy, wealthy, and wise. It breeds earthworms, and earthworms are our friends--they chew up dead organic material and create lots of tiny holes in the ground. And the best part is, worm poop (technically called "castings") is very nutrient rich.
I used to buy dozens of bags of compost each year to spread throughout my yard and gardens. I tended to do this over a few weekends each spring, and it was back breaking work. Now, I can spread a little compost each week, providing my adorable little plants with fresh compost throughout the year. It saves my back and the soil benefits from the steady application of humus. (Humus should not be confused with hummus, which I actually enjoy eating.) And my wife doesn't think that so silly.
An unexpected benefit of my increased interest in compost was the opportunity to commune with nature. There is nothing quite like spending an hour turning a compost pile and letting the earthy smell of rotting vegetable matter waft into your nostrils. You just can't get that experience living in an apartment.
I've also learned many interesting facts about the biology of composting. For example, the ideal compost pile has about 5 parts "brown" to 1 part "green". Now, a rational person might think that "brown" and "green" refer to colors. And that would be wrong. "Brown" refers to carbon rich materials, like dead leaves. "Green" refers to nitrogen rich materials, like fresh grass clippings. So far the brown/ green dichotomy makes sense, but coffee grounds, manure, and urine are "green".
The results of my "go green" initiative have been mixed. This summer's drought undoubtedly stunted the growth of many of my plants. But I am optimistic about the long-term. My adventures with composting are showing signs of greatly benefiting the plants and reducing my watering requirements. My indiscriminate use of pesticides resulted in no mealy bugs or lace bugs this year. My "go green" initiative is not intended to save the planet or anything along those irrational lines. My "go green" initiative is intended for my benefit and my pleasure (and my wife's). And anyone who doesn't like that can kiss my jolly green thumb.
Monday, September 14, 2009
A Day of Service
Last Friday I honored our President's request and spent the day in service--to myself. I am sure that this is not what he had in mind, since he expects all of us to be mindless servants to others. But as Homey D. Clown used to say, "I don't think so... Homey don't play dat!"
My work day began at 5:30 a.m. doing some paperwork and payroll. Unlike the parasites who depend on the government to provide their sustenance, or bail them out when they make bad decisions, I actually provide for myself. In doing so, I am serving myself.
I then met with several customers to assess their needs for the services my company provides. Some might say that I am serving others in this capacity, and in a superficial way, they are correct. Serving others is not my motivation--making money is. Serving others in this context is a mutually beneficial trade and a means for serving myself.
Upon returning to my office, I returned calls from two other customers to discuss proposals I had recently submitted. Both were ready to hire my company, not out of some sense of altruistic duty, but because my company will help satisfy their self-interest. And in helping them do so, I am serving myself.
I then took my wife to lunch. I did this for two reasons. One, we were hungry. Two, I enjoy taking my wife to lunch. We work together. She spends most of the day in the office, while I get to traipse all over the countryside meeting interesting people. I enjoy giving her a chance to get out of the office, and her enjoyment is important to me. (I hasten to add that, while I realize a 10-carat diamond ring might bring her enjoyment, I do have to draw the line somewhere.) In enhancing her enjoyment, I am serving myself. (Somewhat ironically, the restaurant we went to is a buffet, so we literally had to serve ourselves. We even joked about it at the time.)
After lunch we went to look at two prospective rental properties. We are buying rental properties, not to stimulate the economy or take advantage of those who are down on their luck, but to make money. We are doing it to build passive income, acquire equity, and provide for our retirements. We are not planning for the government to provide for us, or for our fellow citizens to serve us. We are perfectly capable of taking care of ourselves, and we will do so--we will serve ourselves.
I spent the remainder of the afternoon doing two activities I enjoy--reading and writing. I did not do this for anyone's benefit or enjoyment but mine. I would like to think that others might somehow benefit from what I learn and the subsequent writing, but that is not, and was not, my motivation. I was serving my own interests--any benefit or enjoyment others get is simply a byproduct.
My day concluded with more selfish activities--pizza and Wii bowling with my wife. In this, my last opportunity of the day to serve someone else, I was mercilessly competitive. (Not in eating the pizza, but the bowling.) I am happy to report that I was stunningly masterful at bowling. And while my wife would have certainly enjoyed winning, as I previously noted, I must draw the line somewhere.
So there you have it--my day of service. I spent it pursuing my values--both material and spiritual. I spent the day doing things I enjoy. I did not concern myself with the needs of others, because I don't expect them to concern themselves with my needs. I engaged in trades that were mutually beneficial to all involved--my customers, the restaurant, and my wife. I spent the day serving my life.
Of course, I spend every day in a similar fashion. The details vary, but the principle does not. I spend every day in service--to myself.
My work day began at 5:30 a.m. doing some paperwork and payroll. Unlike the parasites who depend on the government to provide their sustenance, or bail them out when they make bad decisions, I actually provide for myself. In doing so, I am serving myself.
I then met with several customers to assess their needs for the services my company provides. Some might say that I am serving others in this capacity, and in a superficial way, they are correct. Serving others is not my motivation--making money is. Serving others in this context is a mutually beneficial trade and a means for serving myself.
Upon returning to my office, I returned calls from two other customers to discuss proposals I had recently submitted. Both were ready to hire my company, not out of some sense of altruistic duty, but because my company will help satisfy their self-interest. And in helping them do so, I am serving myself.
I then took my wife to lunch. I did this for two reasons. One, we were hungry. Two, I enjoy taking my wife to lunch. We work together. She spends most of the day in the office, while I get to traipse all over the countryside meeting interesting people. I enjoy giving her a chance to get out of the office, and her enjoyment is important to me. (I hasten to add that, while I realize a 10-carat diamond ring might bring her enjoyment, I do have to draw the line somewhere.) In enhancing her enjoyment, I am serving myself. (Somewhat ironically, the restaurant we went to is a buffet, so we literally had to serve ourselves. We even joked about it at the time.)
After lunch we went to look at two prospective rental properties. We are buying rental properties, not to stimulate the economy or take advantage of those who are down on their luck, but to make money. We are doing it to build passive income, acquire equity, and provide for our retirements. We are not planning for the government to provide for us, or for our fellow citizens to serve us. We are perfectly capable of taking care of ourselves, and we will do so--we will serve ourselves.
I spent the remainder of the afternoon doing two activities I enjoy--reading and writing. I did not do this for anyone's benefit or enjoyment but mine. I would like to think that others might somehow benefit from what I learn and the subsequent writing, but that is not, and was not, my motivation. I was serving my own interests--any benefit or enjoyment others get is simply a byproduct.
My day concluded with more selfish activities--pizza and Wii bowling with my wife. In this, my last opportunity of the day to serve someone else, I was mercilessly competitive. (Not in eating the pizza, but the bowling.) I am happy to report that I was stunningly masterful at bowling. And while my wife would have certainly enjoyed winning, as I previously noted, I must draw the line somewhere.
So there you have it--my day of service. I spent it pursuing my values--both material and spiritual. I spent the day doing things I enjoy. I did not concern myself with the needs of others, because I don't expect them to concern themselves with my needs. I engaged in trades that were mutually beneficial to all involved--my customers, the restaurant, and my wife. I spent the day serving my life.
Of course, I spend every day in a similar fashion. The details vary, but the principle does not. I spend every day in service--to myself.
Monday, April 27, 2009
A Lovely Surprise
Last Friday evening as I was watering some plants, my wife presented me with a written demand: Stop what you are doing, take a shower, and get in my car.
At first I was slightly confused, and then I remembered that this was her month to provide me with a surprise. Several years ago I purchased a book--101 Nights of Grrreat Romance--that we use as a guide for providing one another with surprises. Each page of the book gives a task for one partner to complete for the other.
I dutifully complied with my wife's demand. Despite my prodding, she refused to provide any clue as to where we were going. She took a circuitous route before pulling into the parking lot for a small office building. She led me to an elevator, and down a short hallway to our final destination. We were greeted with a glass of champagne, fresh fruit, and cheese. As we enjoyed our snack, my wife explained what would unfold next.
A few minutes later we were taken to a small room and told to remove our clothes. For the next hour we reveled in delight, as we each received a full-body massage, complete with hot stone therapy. My wife then took me to dinner. It was a first for me, and certainly an experience I would not mind repeating with great frequency.
The book has been a source of great pleasure for us. It can be "easy" to get complacent in a relationship. The book helps us prevent this from occurring, by giving imaginative tasks to complete. While we seldom follow the instructions literally--time, expense, or other restraints sometimes make the task difficult--the book does provide creative ideas that keep the excitement in our relationship.
One of my favorites involved a map of Houston. I took shiny adhesive stars and placed them on locations in the city that had special significance to us. I told my wife that when she identified all of the locations I would give her an award. She quickly identified all but one, and then spent the rest of the week in a futile attempt to win her prize. She drove by the intersection many times, each time convinced that she had finally solved the puzzle.
Late Friday morning I announced that I was going to the bank (we work together). A short time later I called her, saying that there was a problem at the bank and she needed to sign some paperwork. When she arrived, I grabbed her hand and led her towards the intersection that contained her unidentified location. As we approached the door of a particular restaurant, she said, "I've always wanted to eat here." Her timing was perfect, because as she said this I was opening the door. My wife looked at me with complete surprise as I asked for a table for two.
On another occasion, I arrived home to find two gift wrapped boxes on the coffee table. I could not open the boxes, and each day another box or two appeared. On Friday night the boxes were piled on our bed, and I was finally allowed to open them. Each contained a trinket or other memento of places we have visited, events we have attended, or other important aspects of our life together. We had a lot of fun sipping wine, eating snacks, and reminiscing.
Experts on relationships have long recommended "date nights"--an evening away from the kids, out of the house, etc.--for married couples to focus on one another. A healthy relationship, like any value, requires effort. 101 Nights of Grrreat Romance is a useful tool towards that end.
At first I was slightly confused, and then I remembered that this was her month to provide me with a surprise. Several years ago I purchased a book--101 Nights of Grrreat Romance--that we use as a guide for providing one another with surprises. Each page of the book gives a task for one partner to complete for the other.
I dutifully complied with my wife's demand. Despite my prodding, she refused to provide any clue as to where we were going. She took a circuitous route before pulling into the parking lot for a small office building. She led me to an elevator, and down a short hallway to our final destination. We were greeted with a glass of champagne, fresh fruit, and cheese. As we enjoyed our snack, my wife explained what would unfold next.
A few minutes later we were taken to a small room and told to remove our clothes. For the next hour we reveled in delight, as we each received a full-body massage, complete with hot stone therapy. My wife then took me to dinner. It was a first for me, and certainly an experience I would not mind repeating with great frequency.
The book has been a source of great pleasure for us. It can be "easy" to get complacent in a relationship. The book helps us prevent this from occurring, by giving imaginative tasks to complete. While we seldom follow the instructions literally--time, expense, or other restraints sometimes make the task difficult--the book does provide creative ideas that keep the excitement in our relationship.
One of my favorites involved a map of Houston. I took shiny adhesive stars and placed them on locations in the city that had special significance to us. I told my wife that when she identified all of the locations I would give her an award. She quickly identified all but one, and then spent the rest of the week in a futile attempt to win her prize. She drove by the intersection many times, each time convinced that she had finally solved the puzzle.
Late Friday morning I announced that I was going to the bank (we work together). A short time later I called her, saying that there was a problem at the bank and she needed to sign some paperwork. When she arrived, I grabbed her hand and led her towards the intersection that contained her unidentified location. As we approached the door of a particular restaurant, she said, "I've always wanted to eat here." Her timing was perfect, because as she said this I was opening the door. My wife looked at me with complete surprise as I asked for a table for two.
On another occasion, I arrived home to find two gift wrapped boxes on the coffee table. I could not open the boxes, and each day another box or two appeared. On Friday night the boxes were piled on our bed, and I was finally allowed to open them. Each contained a trinket or other memento of places we have visited, events we have attended, or other important aspects of our life together. We had a lot of fun sipping wine, eating snacks, and reminiscing.
Experts on relationships have long recommended "date nights"--an evening away from the kids, out of the house, etc.--for married couples to focus on one another. A healthy relationship, like any value, requires effort. 101 Nights of Grrreat Romance is a useful tool towards that end.
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